Sleeping Fish

I read an article recently about the sleeping habits of fish. Most fish, you see, don't really sleep; they shut down half of their brain and enter a trance state of sort. Lately, I have felt very much like a sleeping fish.

I generally think of myself as a relatively fearless individual. I would not say that I am bold in my fearlessness, but I typically find a way to step outside my comfort zone in confrontation of situations. I must admit, though, lately I have found myself running more frequently. I am over committed; work, school, and civic responsibilities have overwhelmed me in a way that I am uncertain I have previously experienced. As a result, I have partially shut down. I have not been totally present in anything I am doing. If I am entirely intellectually engaged, my whole heart may not be in it; likewise, I have been too mentally exhausted to function fully in situations in which I am completely emotionally invested.

As I considered my predicament of late, another Emerson quote came to mind: Write it on your heart that every day is the best day. If I truly aspired to make everyday the best day, I do not think it possible to be merely partially invested, mentally or emotionally. Even if it were possible, how wasteful is it to ever pass up the opportunity to be fully present, to be boldly fearless...to just be bold.

I will be running again soon, in a much healthier way. I have a solid 300 miles to log in training before the Country Music Half Marathon in April. My first challenge in pursuit of the best day may be finding something positive about 5am runs in 30 degree darkness.

*I "borrowed" this photo from another blog, but I can't remember which one.